3 am...

Well it is 3 am and I'm wide awake...why? I HAVE NO IDEA!!! I slept for maybe 30 minutes to an hour, but not anymore.  I can't get comfortable, the temperature isn't right, and closing my eyes isn't an option.  I have several things on my mind so I figured if I blogged then maybe I would be able to rest.  I'm just a few days away from completing my first month of grad school.  Insane how quickly time has passed.  I have my first final on Friday for Instrumentation.  So far I have a 4.0 in all my classes, but it hasn't come easily.  I quit my job at Chili's last week because they simply wanted me to work too late into the night and my workload was too heavy.  I've learned to take school work one day at a time.  I really cannot think about what homework is due next week or what test I may have or I'll become overwhelmed with stress. My classmates are really sweet ladies.  I don't really know them all that well yet, but we're only a month into a LONG 18 month process. My instructors are different, but knowledgable about their field of study. As sad as this may sound I have had to become lax about certain things.  I guess it is part of growing up and being in the world but not a part of the world.  There are days where I miss Harding and my CSD family like crazy and if I think about it too much I'll cry for a little bit reflecting on the memories, but then I remember that everybody has to move on at some point in their life and that MY GOD has a PURPOSE for my life. I know He wants me here for a reason and each week that passes I feel as though I see that reason a little more clearly.  January-April were hard spiritual times for me and ever since I moved here I have been a lot stronger of a Christian.  I am attending Valley View church of Christ and it is simply wonderful.  I am starting to form relationships with some of the people my age and I thoroughly enjoy it.  I feel as though every lesson has been written directly for me.  My Bible is constantly being written in with excellent points made by the different guest speakers and I can see my relationship with God growing deeper daily.  I concluded the other day that it may be possible God moved me here to bring me back to Him.  After analyzing that, I've decided if I don't pass my praxis or comps next fall, but I'm a young lady who can be seen as a pillar for God...I'll see this time spent as a success because in the end degrees, jobs, and money do not matter at all, but only my relationships with God and people.  So this may not make any sense considering it is super late and I am finally getting sleepy, but it is what I think about often.  I also am constantly singing a song that my precious Mommy has dedicated to me by SideWalk Prophets "The Words I Would Say"... The part that is always stuck in my head is..."Be strong in the Lord and never give up hope you're gonna do great things I already know, God's got His hand on you so don't live life in fear".  That isn't the entire chorus, but it is the part that plays on repeat in my head...God sure did bless me with incredible parents.  I'm so blessed that they passed on the love of Christ to me! Ok I'm going to sleep...again I'm sorry for the scatter-brained (probably not a real word) entry.

Avoiding Homework...

I'm so supposed to be writing a lab report right now, but instead here I am. School has started and it is difficult.  I enjoy the challenge of it for the most part, but all the assignments I am receiving that involve me writing papers in APA style I dislike to the 10000 degree! I am totally fine writing (hence the blog), but when I have to make sure everything is just perfect and have a bibliography page it honestly makes me want to forget how to write all together.  Besides writing the lab report, I am brainstorming about the topic for my thesis.  I feel as though something along the lines of synaptic pruning is right up my alley.  I have been reading about it here lately until the early hours of the morning.  Yes you read that correctly I am choosing to read about how the brain virtually deletes what it determines is un-useful information instead of sleep.  I thoroughly enjoy reading, taking notes, and coming up with solutions to this topic...however am I ready to write tons and tons and tons of information in APA STYLE about it?  I have no idea, but I have to figure it out by next Tuesday.  As one might have guessed Jonesboro is starting to get a little more comfortable each week.  I am learning the back roads, short cuts, and where things are.  I did get lost on campus the other day...dreadful!!! I had to go to a continuing education conference in the Student Union.  Well I only know where the Reynolds is.  I have been in the Student Union one time to get my student id, but I parked in the parking garage and went in from somewhere inside it.  Needless to say I had to ask for directions and by the time I finally found the conference on the third floor the speaker was being introduced.  Anyways life is moving along at a steady pace and everything is going good.  I'm still amazed every day that I am in graduate school and that God has this awesome plan for my life.  He is such a great God.

On your mark, get set, GO!!!!

June 1st has come and gone which means I am officially a Grad student at Arkansas State University.  This title also means I am loaded down with work.  Please note that I was slightly worried that AState would be a breeze coming from my private university. Ha! What an ignorant thought! I have completed my 3rd day of graduate school and I sit here in my apartment where I've been for the past 6 hours working on homework.  I am still working on reading 2 chapters in a textbook "The Voice and Voice Therapy".  Yes I know I sound like a slow reader, but I desire more than to just read the text.  I want to comprehend it and be able to sound intelligent when asked what I read.  6 hours later and the only question I will be able to answer is, 'What did you read about?' my response: 'The larynx'.  I honestly know a lot more than that, pinky promise, but I'm too afraid to speak up fearing I'll say something incorrectly or get something totally backwards.  Last night while studying I confused the epiglottis with the esophagus.  If anybody reading this is a CSD person you know that was a HUGE mistake!!! I guess I was in Jenn World and not paying attention anyways I went back and re-read the sentence and I was like oh my word I'm losing my mind!!!  This morning I went to my neurologist for my 6 month check-up.  He asked how my migraines had been and how my migraine medicine was working.  I told him the medicine was working great, except for the past month or so.  I then explained my migraines had moved from solely above my eyebrows to the back of my neck and right above my eyebrows.  He then inquired: "Have you been under a lot of stress lately?".  To this I replied, "Well I found out on April 26th that I got into grad school here and had to leave everything and move here...grad school started June 1st."  He was like oh yeah I'd say thats pretty stressful...well you're having tension headaches along with your migraines.  (AWESOME).  Basically he gave me muscle relaxers to take when I get "tension headaches" (everyday?), but I can't take them on school days (Monday-Thursday) until I learn how my body will react to them.  Sheesh!!!  So I'm not really sure how to handle tension headaches since Dr. Neurologist Man said tylenol, advil, etc. won't get rid of them and I can't take muscle relaxers on school days. My life has been taken over by Grad School and yay for me I start at Chili's in Jonesboro at the end of this week.  Hopefully I will learn to lean on God through all of this and not myself thereby getting rid of the tension headaches without taking medication.  Also if I learn to lean on God I'll survive the next 18 months because without Him there is no way I'll make it!  Ok now I have to get back to reading this textbook so I can finish and move onto the next one...